Alright, this one is about to get heavy. No one wants to talk about how to handle rejection, I get it.

A key part of my professional philosophy is rooted in human-centered digital marketing. Which means keeping it real.

Truth be told, that’s just more how I have chosen to live my life.

I’m an open book.

So, when I talk about how to handle rejection, then please understand that this applies to everyone at every level: children, professionals, CEOs, teachers, and especially me.

How to Handle Rejection – the Wrong Way

First, let’s just lay it all out on the table.

Over the past month, I have been rejected by every single new opportunity that has come my way or that I have sought out.

Pity party time, yeah?

Well, no, but let me explain why.

There is a right way and a wrong way to handle rejection.

The wrong way is to react.

Reaction means that you are acting based on the factors surrounding the cause of the reaction. Seldom do we ever react in a positive manner.

Reaction is quick, short, and oftentimes violent. It is a word that hits at an explosion of activity.

But…

Not all reactions are loud, are they?

I have to admit that, in the midst of these rejections, I told myself (and others) that people just don’t like me. They say I am a great person, a great writer, etc., etc. But, if those things were true, then things would pan out, wouldn’t they? Unless…

…Unless the problem is me.

So I turned inward. I chose to self-destruct.

Thankfully, I was able to pull myself out of that muck and mire and choose a different way…

How to Handle Rejection – the Right Way

Rather than react, I chose to respond.

I reached out to those who rejected me and tried to learn and adapt so that I could do and be better the next time an opportunity rolls around.

This meant I had to pause…

Reflect…

Breathe…

And then I had to think of a way to take lemons and, you know, do something with them besides making lemonade because that would be a cliche.

My point is there is no way that reacting will improve our situation. It might make us feel better in the moment, for sure. It will not set us up for future success, though.

I’m an emotional person, so I took each and every rejection personally. I still do.

Going all the way back to my transition out of ministry, I still feel the sting of rejection.

Even when I find myself in the position where the stars are aligning for something great to happen and…

…just like that…

gone.

I still can choose to respond.

You never know what will be around the next bend. It may still suck. Life does sometimes. 

A Nihilistic Approach on How to Handle Rejection

Over the years, I liked to think that I have discovered the perfect solution on how to handle rejection.

Give yourself this choice each and every time:

Either die…

Or…

Move on.

When I lost my job my train of thought was, “well, either this is the end and my whole family eventually dies homeless and hungry…or we will move on to something else.”

No promise about the next thing being better.

No promise of greener pastures.

No false hope.

But, the choice was obvious, wasn’t it?

Why would I not do everything in my power to make sure the first thing never happens?

It’s a dark approach, sure, but it has been incredibly effective at kicking myself into high gear when necessary.

Either this rejection kills my business, or it doesn’t. Either this rejection leads to my death, or it doesn’t.

If the worst thing that can happen is you and/or your loved ones dying, then every other option seemes peachy.

Alright, So Are You Ready to Stare Rejection In the Face?

I’m done being depressing. Let’s recap, don’t react to rejection, but choose to respond. An intentional response will always lead to a better outcome (and a healthier transition for you) than a quick reaction.

If you like what you see, then hit me up and maybe I can draft some sweet, sweet copy for you. Otherwise, I would love for you to join my group for those wanting to take a more human-centered approach to digital marketing (interacting online). That still not your thing? Okay, fine. Then, do you like emails? I send those, too. You know the drill from here!